Die When I'm Young - Rachel Bloom
Burn out fast and dance forever.
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Website: Racheldoesstuff.com
Twitter: Racheldoesstuff
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Originally Produced by Funny or Die
Starring Rachel Bloom
Written by Rachel Bloom and Jack Dolgen
Directed by Dan Gregor
Produced by Ben Sheehan at Funny or Die
Song Produced by Jack Dolgen
Cinematography by E. Gustavo Petersen
Edited by Caleb Swyers
Choreographed by Kathryn Burns
Puppet Operated by Victor Yerrid ( / puppetsnshit )
Featuring: Lorenzo Lamas, Erik Weiner and Greg Burke
Dancers: Kathryn Burns, Kellen Lewis, Rachel Montez and Casey Kringlen
Also Featuring: Rebekka Johnson, Bridgid Ryan, Andrew McLellan, Brian McGackin, Steven Brand, Nate Clark, Alex Lewis and Seth Rotkin
Puppet made by David Fino
Hair and makeup by Rachel Olsen
Wardrobe by Lauren Morelli and Mary Kasprzak
Production Design by Caity Birmingham
AC: Nick Bianchi
Gaffer: Mariscela Mendez
Grip: Chris Andersen
Grip and Electric: Ron Wilson
Additional Production Design: Stephen McGlade
PA: Pat Stansik
Sound: Adam Dolin
Location Manager: Melody Carpenter for Stagg Street Studio
I DON'T LIVE FOR THE FUTURE
I DON'T LIVE IN THE PAST
I THROW MY HANDS UP IN BLISS READY FOR THE WORLD'S KISS
NO REGRETS OR HESITATIONS TAKING CHANCES
'CAUSE I'M GONNA
DIE WHEN I'M YOUNG
BURN OUT FAST AND DANCE FOREVER
GONNA DIE WHEN I'M YOUNG
'CAUSE-
(Phone call)
I'M GONNA
DIE WHEN I'M YOUNG
I DIDN'T EXPECT THIS TO LITERALLY HAPPEN
GONNA DIE WHEN I'M YOUNG
I GUESS THIS IS WHAT I WANTED.
BACK IN THE CLUB, SHAKIN' MY ASS
THEN I HAVE TO LAY DOWN FOR A WHILE!
(YEAH, LAY DOWN)
HANG WITH THE DJ, SPIN A COUPLE'A TRACKS
AND THEN I THROW UP BILE!
(COOL)
GETTIN' FREAKY WITH A HOTTIE
(AND WE JUST DON'T STOP)
THE WAY HE'S TOUCHIN' UP MY BODY
MAKES MY PANTIES DROP!
I SAY, "I'M DYIN"
HE SAYS, "I'M SORRY!"
I SAY, "LET'S FUCK!"
HE SAYS, "I'M SAD NOW."
GONNA
DIE WHEN I'M YOUNG
I SHOULD HAVE HAD MY HOME CHECKED FOR ASBESTOS
GONNA DIE WHEN I'M YOUNG
YEAH, IT WAS WAY COOLER IN THEORY.
DOCTORS GIVE ME HEAVY SEDATIVES
(O-M-G I'M SUCH A STONER)
HANDS ARE FEELIN' UP MY BODY
'CAUSE I'M AN ORGAN DONOR!
I'M DYIN' YOUNG JUST 'CAUSE I LIVED TOO FAST.
ALSO
I HAVE TUMOR.
Yo! Y'all think you're so cool for dyin' young? Well I'm an aborted fetus, motherfucker! I died so young I didn't even live!
I'LL NEVER GO TO PRESCHOOL OR THE PROM
SO I GET BITCHES HOTTER THAN MY TEENAGE MOM
I SPIT RHYMES FASTER THAN MY STEM CELLS HEAL
SO LET THE BEAT DROP LIKE MY NUTS NEVER WILL.
DIE WHEN I'M YOUNG
Oh God, this is horrifying!
DIE WHEN I'M YOUNG!
Please, I take it back!
DIE WHEN I'M YOUNG
I should never have aborted that pimp-ass fetus!
DIE WHEN I'M YOUNG.
Hey, that bitch is dead.
