Self-isolation for the 1% - CRYONAP {The Kloons}
Just ordered one of these. Wake me up when there’s a vaccine.
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In a society filled with hopelessness, fear, and depression, we are the unfortunate products of our environment, caught in a perpetual state of fight or flight. So perhaps it’s not you, but the world that needs to change.
Imagine, a whole different time, in what feels like no time at all…
Put your life on ice…
And wait for the change you wish to see in the world.
Simply detail your minimum criteria for an ideal future and let time do the rest.
Our state of the art time transportation service utilizes ultra low cryogenic temperatures allowing you to enter a deep, cool, hibernation state - all from the comfort of our maximum security facility.
Once all of your prerequisites have been met, you’ll be gently thawed alive, fresh and supple in the same great body you have today.
Whether it’s years, decades, or even centuries from now, you can rest assured knowing that you’ll be greeted by the world of your dreams.
And while your insides vitrify, let your outsides exemplify...your unique sense of style. Each CryoNap pod is fully customizable. The optional sidecar pet chamber brings your favorite family member along for the ride.
So, give a cold shoulder to the present, and warm welcome to your future.
CryoNap. Don’t fight, don’t flight….freeze.
Sign up today to start your seven day freeze trial.
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If you're wondering WTF our logo outro is about, learn more here: http://bit.ly/1LFSkLE
Outro music is "Robots Attack 1" by Jack Elphick from epidemicsound.com.
