Lazy Lazy Cat (Самый ленивый кот)
Lazy cat, even doesn't want to play
Study Reveals Why Cats Are Lazy
A new study suggests that prehistoric cats domesticated themselves, rather than being bred by humans, which is why they "do not perform directed tasks." No word yet on the evolutionary source of lolz. (pic via icanhascheezburger.com) [NYT]
Cat Schedule
2am - 6am: Do laps around the house, keeping me up.
6am - 8am: Settle onto a pillow for a days sleep.
8am - 7pm: Sleep, eat, scratch the sofa, poop, sleep.
7pm - 2am: Act cute and remind me why I like cats.
7am - 8am: Try to cuddle, and only during this hour, which is the hour I need to get ready for work and I don't have time to cuddle.
8am - 8:01am: Be pissed off about it.
8:02am - 11pm: Sleep, Eat, Shit, Stare at Wall, Chill in Bathtub.
11pm - 6:59am: Fight each other, chase each other, annoy owner.
All the cats I've known have stuck to a pretty similar schedule. Mine's:
5 a.m.: Poke human's feet/arms/head with claws until she awakens. Demand to be carried to favorite chair in living room.
5:30 - 7:30 a.m.: Sleep in favorite chair.
7:30 - 8:30 a.m.: Cry at door to be let out. Escape into condo hallway when human attempts to leave for work, run free for five blissful minutes.
8:30 a.m. - 5:30 p.m.: Sleep, eat, chew newspapers, chase golf tees around hardwood floor, survey domain from 15th-floor balcony.
5:30 - 10 p.m.: Attack floor rug, walk across laptop keyboard, shove bum in human's face, nom on human's hand and otherwise express gratitude for human's presence.
10 p.m. - 5 a.m.: Sleep, purring adorably, at human's feet. Too bad she's not awake to appreciate it.
So it's not just my kitty who likes to hang out in the bathtub.
My cat's schedule:
1 a.m.: Try to play with alarm clock power cord. Get kicked out of bedroom.
3 a.m.: Cry at and scratch bedroom door. Get let back in.
4 a.m.: Do laps around bedroom. Get kicked out again.
6 a.m.: Cry to be let back in.
6 a.m.-8 a.m.: Snuggle with human.
8 a.m.-9 a.m.: Literally bounce off the walls.
9 a.m.-6 p.m.: Sleep, eat, stare out window, drag human's gloves and dirty socks into bathtub, dig around in potting soil.
6 p.m.-1 a.m.: Steadfastly refuse to play until the 1 a.m. power cord action.
