Parenting Tips: Talking About Sex, Helping Your Teenager Wait To Have Sex - Planned Parenthood
Parents - we play an important role with our teens waiting to have sex until they are ready. We understand the social pressure and reasons why teens choose to have sex or practice abstinence. We can help our teens by setting expectations about sexual activity, talking with them, and helping them build self esteem and confidence.
Be honest with them. Let them know you're there to talk and listen if they have any concerns or questions about sex. The key is to have an ongoing and open dialogue.
How will you talk to your teen about sex? Text "TALK2TEEN" to 69866 to let us know what you plan to do.
Need help? Visit http://bit.ly/V6BrRb or check out one of our other videos by clicking on the screen or below:
Parenting Tips: A Tool for Talking about Sex, Introduction: http://bit.ly/OzqvtW
Talking About Sex and Relationships More Comfortably: http://bit.ly/QEStTA
Helping Your Sexually Active Teen Be Safe: http://bit.ly/Sy2duW
Transcript:
©2012 Planned Parenthood® Federation of America
"PARENTING TIPS: TALKING ABOUT SEX, HELPING YOUR TEENAGER WAIT TO HAVE SEX - PLANNED PARENTHOOD" - VIDEO TRANSCRIPT:
MOTHER: It's totally natural for teens to think about sex. In fact, seven out of ten teens have sexual intercourse by the age of 19. But we can help our teens wait until they're ready by talking with them.
Here are a few tips:
Be clear about your feelings and expectations on when you think it's okay to have sex.
Listen to your teen's point of view.
Talk about the pressure your teen might be feeling.
Discuss specific strategies for "saying no."
Okay, let me show you what this might look like. Let's say you're watching a movie with your son when a steamy scene shows up. You could say something like...
MOTHER TALKING TO SON: Wow, that couple got physical REALLY quick! What do you think?
[Kid mumbles answer]
MOTHER: Yeah, way too fast. He hadn't even met her parents yet! You know I wouldn't go for that! But just curious, when do you think it's okay for people to start having sex?
[Kid mumbles answer]
MOTHER: Really? Listen, it may seem like everybody's doing it, but in reality, they're not. The average age people first have sexual intercourse is 17! It's perfectly normal to wait until you're older. As you know, I want you to wait until you're ready, in a healthy relationship, and prepared.
I know you might feel a lot of pressure to have sexual experiences. What would you say if you were being pressured?
[Kid mumbles answer]
MOTHER: Yeah, that's a good way to handle it; I'm impressed with your assertiveness. You know, you can always blame it on me --tell them that I'd be really upset.
[Laughing]
MOTHER: Another way is to avoid situations where things might get out of hand, like being alone together or drinking, okay?
[Kid nods]
MOTHER: One more thing...even though I want you to wait, if you seriously start thinking about getting serious, talk to me. I want you to be prepared with birth control and condoms. Promise?
[Kid mumbles answer]
