How To Ask The Outgoing Winner For Help
This video can also be titled, "The Do's and Don'ts Of Asking For Mentorship From A Woman Whose Job You Want." It can take awhile to feel comfortable asking for help from those you admire and look up to, especially in the world of pageants where it seems like the winners always have it together. But the truth is, they are human too - and most humans like to help other humans!
Don't be afraid to ask winners for help because if they were politicians, you would be the closest thing they have to constituents. Ask for help! But know how to do it the right way.
A few other things:
1) Don't just reach out to this year's winner. Queens from previous years are great to approach too! Some of them will even have more time for you than the current winner, and deeper wisdom that comes with time away from competing.
2) If someone doesn't respond to your request for mentorship (which, by the way, should never be phrased outright as, "Will you mentor me?"*) it's never personal. They may be busy, your message may have been unread, or any number of reasons that have nothing to do with you. Don't be discouraged. Instead, look elsewhere, like in my point above in #1.
*As someone who has been approached to be a mentor in the past, I frankly am turned off whenever someone opens with that line, especially if I know nothing about you. Instead, I respond much better to requests for specific areas you'd like my feedback in. Most people who are in positions to be mentors find it a lot easier and a lower "barrier to entry" to start mentoring someone in a goal-oriented capacity (ie can you get my resume in shape, or can you help me decide which of these two gowns looks best on my figure) and it gives the mentor time to get to know the mentee in a lower-pressure way. Most of my current mentees have evolved organically in this manner. The ones who emailed me cold asking, "Will you be my mentor?" have mostly dropped off.
